Wednesday, December 25, 2013

The Leaves That Change

I value so much the stories that come through my time here on earth. I have found that storytelling through photography is my favorite thing in this life to do besides worship. I love worship so much that storytelling has become one of the countless ways I do.

I've had requests for photography like this come through several times during my time in this profession and it is such a comforting and holy thing to be able to do this. On October 2nd of this year, Kristy wrote the following message: 
I live in xx and I have a 4 month old little girl. I'm 28 and my brother recently died in a car accident. 2 weeks later, my fiance died in an atv accident. I would like to get some pictures of my little girl and me but I don't know how to make it special. I saw on pinterest a shoot you did with another young widow and I liked that a lot. I wonder if you travel and what the cost would be for something like that for us? Thanks
kristy
How would you respond? With a total? A solid amount? Let me see...$$...
I struggled because it was just so unbelievable. She lost who? When? What's the timeline?

I sent a text to my friend, Terri, whose grandchild was the subject in the shoot Kristy had seen. She is Corey's mother and a beacon of light in the darkness of losing a child before their time. I wanted her to know that her son's story was still connecting with people in this life. I wanted her to pray for Kristy. It went like this:
Me: "I got this message this morning. What a heartbreak! Will you pray for her? That story is still connecting with people!" (message above attached)
Terri: "Oh my God!! I will go with u! Of course I'll pray."

Terri did not hesitate to reach out to Kristy and it taught me so much about her heart. She boosted my own heart and her inner "joy" in the deepest sense of what joy means helped me understand the sacredness of Kristy's message.

I understand that these things are "unpriceable". They are priceless to the receiver, priceless opportunities for the photographer. An opportunity to bless in an immeasurable manner. How could I possibly better utilize my God-blessed talent? How on this earth could I not dedicate this work to the glory of Him who is the ultimate Comforter? I lost my father in 2007 and I have felt the pain of losing someone close to me...but not two within 2 weeks of each other. Not my brother and my fiancee-the father of my one month old daughter. Neither Terri nor I could imagine it. So I dedicated this work to the Spirit within us. It's the only way. At least that's the way I see it. It came to me, to my lap, because of a special work I had done before. I was blessed. Of course I would volunteer the work, the time, the gas, the prayer involved in it.
We planned the shoot and met to shoot this past month. Please enjoy the images as well as a smattering of her own-they are all a testament and dedication to the love of Christ.

Kristy and Jason were excited to be expecting their first child, a girl they named Zoey. They had a photo shoot with Laura McCarthy Photography before Zoey's birth. They couldn't wait to meet sweet Zoey. They celebrated with friends and got prepared for their new little family.


 Zoey was born in June of 2013. She had a grand entrance into the world. She brought joy and laughter and love to Kristy, Jason, her uncle Daniel, and soon-expected aunt Ashley, as well as to her grandparents. Everything was great! They had fun together.
Kristy and Zoey:
 Uncle Daniel and Zoey:
Then the next month came. July of 2013. A month that would become a time in the life of her mother that would test her deepest sense of life and of self. Zoey's uncle Daniel Lee, Kristy's younger brother, died in a fatal car crash at the age of 24. He loved so deeply! He was an amazing person. He was engaged to be married to his soul mate, Ashley.
 

He was studying economics and business and worked as a pest control tech. He was a positive personality and funny guy with tons of friends who he loved.  He enjoyed everyday of his life and was kind to others. He was always helping a stranger or friend and always had a joke to tell and a loud, distinct laugh you could hear from another room. He was planning to propose to Ashley after getting his diploma. They would get married on the farm where they spent most of their free time hunting. four-wheeling, and sitting around bonfire...perhaps would live there one day with their children.
Daniel is loved by so many and will never be forgotten. 

In the hearts of his family, the shock was still strong when the next tragedy hit only two weeks later. This time it was Jason, Zoey's father. He had an accident on an ATV and it was fatal. Devastation rolled into the heart of Kristy and countless loved ones as they tried to make sense of the event.

Jason Taylor was 27 years old. He loved outdoor activities, especially target shooting. He collected guns and enjoyed playing video games and being with friends. He had recently graduated from an A/C program and had done air conditioning installation and repair since he was young. He was already working at a company when he graduated the program. He loved spending time with his family-especially Kristy and Zoey-more than anything.  He was a family man and great father to Zoey.
 
 He was a thoughtful and loving person who would often, on his own accord, go to church and sit with his soon to be mother-in-law when Kristy wasn't feeling well during her pregnancy.  He brought Kristy real flowers constantly. Every time the flowers died, he would replace them. Kristy had always loved floral design and he would spend his last dime to surprise her with them for no special reason other than love her. He had a an amazing heart. They spent almost all of their time together; they were inseparable. He proposed on Valentine's Day with a gorgeous ring that he had asked Kristy's mom to help him pick it out. Kristy and Jason were planning a beach destination wedding at Atlantis in the Bahamas in November of this year.
A father's love never dies; it resides in the hearts of those he loved.

Days after Jason's funeral, Kristy, Ashley, and Zoey walked the Sam Houston University stage in Daniel's place to receive his diploma. Kristy had made a Sam Houston tutu as a special surprise for her brother that he never got to see. Friends and family were in attendance to watch this special moment.
In October, Kristy messaged me. In November, we took pictures. This December, Zoey was dedicated to God.
Five months have passed since the tragedies occurred-not nearly enough time for it all to sink in. Shock value is still high and the women in this story have just begun their journeys of healing. But time will pass and healing will take place. Zoey has a bright future ahead of her despite the darkness that clouded her first months of life. Yet, she will have these moments locked in memory forever. This time is locked safe. It is in the eye of the storm. It is locked so she can remember that God was there. He indeed was there.
He was there in the leaves.

He sat under the trees.

He filled up their hearts.


He drove the breeze across Daniel's boots and hat.


He was there in the whisper of Jason's picture.


He was there in me.


As we finished up our shoot and started to say goodbye on a beautiful day at the park, I asked Kristy, Ashley, and Kristy's mom, Deborah, if I could pray for them. We stood in a group, held hands, and prayed.


 I couldn't imagine a more perfect ending to our time together. That is, until they asked us to lunch. Terri and I slowed down for an afternoon, talked with them, heard their hearts, their grief, their pain, their questions...and just loved. Terri was a star. So loving, so understanding. The depth of the connectivity they share is impossible to beat. What they have in common cannot be fabricated or replicated by anything in this world. They really were meant to meet. I'm so glad I listened to the Spirit that first said, "Do this work", then "Tell Terri", then, "Dedicate this", then "Commit yourself to prayer", then, "Pray with them-do not fear", then, "Spend time". A Spirit-led encounter is infinitely better than any other encounter you'll ever have. For me, it's infinitely better than a soap opera on TV, a movie, or even enjoying this world and it's things.

Kristy has a unique story-one filled to the brim with heartache. The heartache gives birth to hope, hope births promise, promise births faith, faith births trust, trust births joy. The joy will come. Zoey will see the leaves change colors in her mother's face and spring will come again. As she grows and learns, she will be proud that Kristy is her mom. It's no wonder that this Christmas is hard on their family. I invite you to pray for Kristy, Ashley, Zoey, and Deborah for as many days as you can. I see a strength in Kristy. Her eyes hide a joy behind them. If I can see that, then Jesus can see so much more. He has the reassurance for her to know that she will rise from these ashes. She will come out of this journey having been changed for the better and be much, much wiser. She will hear His voice better, know His comfort more, and rest in his grace easier. She will have so much to teach Zoey from this hard time in her life-she'll have an infinite amount of wisdom and a new love for life she will never take for granted as before. Jason and Daniel are not gone-no, not at all. Far from it. They watch from the heavens and guard their ladies because that's the kind of men they were. I am so blessed to have had the opportunity to document this storm for them and to give them images that one day will bring reassurance that God was there.

I'd like to share some song lyrics that I was reminded of while composing this blog. It was written by a man who lost his five year old daughter in an accident-you may know him ;) Lord bless Steven Curtis Chapman for writing this song of worship in the midst of his grief. 

"It was the day the world went wrong
I screamed til my voice was gone
And watched through the tears as everything
came crashing down
Slowly panic turns to pain
As we awake to what remains
and sift through the ashes that are left
behind
But buried deep beneath
All our broken dreams
we have this hope:

Out of these ashes... beauty will rise
and we will dance among the ruins
We will see Him with our own eyes
Out of these ashes... beauty will rise
For we know, joy is coming in the morning...
in the morning, beauty will rise

So take another breath for now,
and let the tears come washing down,
and if you can't believe I will believe
for you.

Cuz I have seen
the signs of spring!
Just watch and see:

I can hear it in the distance
and it's not too far away.
It's the music and the laughter
of a wedding and a feast.
I can almost feel the hand of God
reaching for my face
to wipe the tears away, and say,
"It's time to make everything new."
~Beauty Will Rise, Steven Curtis Chapman
Read Steven's own story here.

God bless! ~Julizza

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