Transformation Essay Winner!

Announcing our winner for the Transformation Essay!
April from Magnolia writes:

The most important transformation in my life occurred on December 9, 2004 when I realized that I was pregnant with my first child at the age of 31. My husband and I had been married for 8 years and I was perfectly happy with my life. I am a very giving person, I think my friends and family would agree with that, but when it came to the decision of having a child, I very selfishly decided that I did not want to be a mom. I was happy with sleeping in on the weekends, not having to worry about a little person who would demand all of my time or deal with the financial burden. I liked my designer handbags and being able to go shopping when I wanted. My husband kept telling me that we needed to pray about it but I did not want to pray about it. I had it all figured out. I was going to do things my way and on my terms. Deep down, I wrestled with the guilt that came with that decision. I would hear stories of other women that so desperately wanted a child and here I was, just brushing motherhood so easily aside. I would just bury my guilt and carry on, happy with my decision. I justified my decision usually by convincing myself that I would not make a good mother anyway.

On December 9, 2004 I took a pregnancy test and I have never been so terrified in my entire life as I was when that tiny little screen flashed the word "Pregnant". My husband, bless his heart, he called every person we knew. I have never seen him happier. His happiness eased some of my fears and my panic but I did not know how I was going to deal with the pressures of motherhood. I have to admit that I was a little annoyed at God. Wasn't it MY decision not to have children?

On July 15, 2005 at 5:03 p.m., I was blessed with the most beautiful thing I have ever laid eyes. CW came into our lives almost exactly 5 months after my mother lost her younger brother and my grandmother lost her youngest son in a motorcycle accident. CW not only blessed my husband and I but he blessed our entire family. He not only transformed me as a person and as a woman but he transformed our entire family. I know that when my grandmother held CW, it helped to ease some of the pain she felt for her loss and gave her hope. CW was a blessing from God in so many ways. The only way that I can describe the love that a mother feels for her child is that I don't think I ever truly knew the meaning of the word L-O-V-E until I had CW.

I now buy my handbags at Target after my old one is falling apart. I love buying CW a new outfit and could care less about going shopping for myself. God blessed me with the ultimate gift and I thank Him every day for showing me humility and teaching me that He is in control and that I should always rely on His grace and His love.

Thank you for allowing me to share my personal and spiritual story of transformation.

Such a great story of love and how God shows He truly is in control. I appreciate the honesty in being "a little annoyed at God". After all, so many of us feel that way when things don't go OUR way (in the way that we think they should). What I have learned is to trust God, and in Him, I always have hope. I believe April experienced Romans 12:2:

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will."

Great job, April! You will receive a free session and package, CONGRATULATIONS!


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