New Year = New Beginnings

We are His portion and He is our prize!

Happy New Year! I am writing with a heavy and grateful heart as we start this new year. I am ready for a new year, and to make resolutions that will resonate within me for the rest of my life. Sometimes I think there just comes a time for each of us. As I write, I'm pouring inspirational songs into my head, and it really effects my outlook, so watch out!

A new year--new beginnings...it seems so simple to think you can start all over again. I remember feeling this way back when, and I now realize how difficult it was each year. Why is it so difficult? Because each year, you still have memories of your past, and whether deliberate or not, there are people around you that may make it difficult for you to forget. Thank God He isn't that way at all!

I don't want to simply rattle off some resolutions and get it over with; like I've mentioned, I am writing with a heavy and grateful heart. My resolutions have been inspired by many songs recently, one in particular by David Crowder. It is called How He Loves and I would like for you to hear it!

How He Loves by David Crowder
Play song from Lala.com Church Music - 2009 - 5:19

Here are the lyrics so you can follow along as it plays:

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us so,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

Yeah, He loves us,
Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves.

We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If His grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
And Heaven meets earth like an unforseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…

Well, I can't say enough how this song speaks my heart and some of the realizations I'm coming to in this new year! I hope you enjoyed it.

As I look at the new year, with new promises and blessings sure to come, I turn my back on the year past, but never to its blessings. I have come across the most amazing people, amazing love, and the most amazing instruments of God. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt He placed these people in my path and has blessed me in tremendous ways through them. He is shaping me through their love, diligence, sacrifices, and examples. I would be a fool to ignore their significance. These beautiful people have marked my life for the better. Thank you; if you're reading this, you know who you are.

A pause for another song that speaks my heart.

Your Hands by JJ Heller
Listen on: Lala Painted Red - 2008 - 3:36

Lyrics:

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn’t there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That you would take my pain away
You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crooked lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

When you walked upon the earth
You healed the broken, lost and hurt
I know you hate to see me cry
One day you will set all things right
Yeah, one day you will set all things right

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands
Your hands that shaped the world
Are holding me
They hold me still

Obviously, another way to look at how the past is the past. One day He will set all things right, and when my world shook, Heaven stood. When my heart broke, I never left His hands.

Now, for my resolutions. I resolve to firstly pursue God with a passion and force. I want to sprint to my God this year and seek to know Him as if I'm being chased, because I am! I am running to my better life, and I'm being pursued by the dark forces of negativity, hopelessness, selfishness, and regret. It all seems so reversed; like living in Him should feel like I'm chained, but I can feel how it is freeing--even more --confident, fulfilling, and peaceful, yet humble, at the same time. I'm tired of belonging only to me; the rewards I have in store for myself aren't very grand, nor do they last very long. No, the challenge will be living for others. There, the rewards are full and great, and last forever. How could I ignore the examples He's sent for me to see? What shall I do when I see them in heaven? "Sorry, I know what you did, but I couldn't do the same." No, I'll rejoice with them and our rewards shall be great. I will study His word and learn the lessons He has in store for me this year. I will grow. I leave my guilt, regrets, and forgiven sins in 2009; I won't carry them into 2010. As David Crowder put it, "I don’t have time to maintain these regrets, when I think about, the way..." He loves me.

Secondly, I resolve to do less business and pour more heart into what I do. I love what I do--both in trade and in work--and I haven't had a problem being passionate for it. Sometimes it can become just business and work, though. I don't want to live that way; I will renew my soul often, hopefully daily, for the good of the people I work for and with.

Thirdly, I resolve to be passionate about my relationships in my family. Immediate or not, I don't care. Just because they know me the best doesn't mean I can't be an example and a light for them. I want to live for them more than I live for me. I want to give them grace like Jesus has given me. My work and interests are important to me, but my God and my family is more. I want my kids and husband to have a Jesus example in their own home and to live a happy and full life of laughter and love. I know I can directly effect that by who I am around them and how much grace I show them.

Lastly, I resolve to take care of my body. I feel better when I'm in shape and eating well. Our health as a family is in large part subject to what I cook (if I do!) every night. Time has been so scarce that I've put exercise and eating right on the back burner. I resolve to study and find creative solutions for our family's health.

I never said my resolutions were going to be easy. I know they will be tough--some more than others. I give myself permission to shoot for the stars and hit the moon. If Jesus doesn't come first, and I've lived to see the end the year, then knowing more about my God and walking with Jesus is my success. That's another great reward--not fearing death. If I die, then God just wanted to show me His world and my reward. It would be my greatest pleasure, my greatest honor, to see it!

As for this world, and speaking of pouring heart into this passion of mine, here's a glorious new heart for you! This little boy is just so precious!! My heart bursts for this mother who gets to care for this little one!